Sunday, February 12, 2012

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So Thankful For This Life!


I wanted to write this post very carefully and put a lot of thought into it. There is a saying "Ask and you shall receive" (If it is in God's will) I truly believe in that, but I also know that many many people ask God and hope and pray to receive the blessings they ask for, and for some reason it doesn't happen. I can't explain this, I am not God, and I certainly am not deserving in the blessings he has bestowed upon me. The blessings I feel in life right now at this moment seem so unreal. I really just can't believe it happened.

My First Blessing!
When my first son was born I dreaded the idea of going back to work and only seeing my little boy for two to three hours a day. The thought made me sick to my stomach. The thought that someone else would see his first smile and witness his first milestones made my stomach turn inside out. He was having problems gaining weight, had acid reflux so bad he wasn't keeping bottles down and I didn't trust anyone to monitor his situation with keeping him propped up after feedings and the one person we hired to watch him was never home when we came to pick him up. While we gave her permission to run errands with him and do things with him outside the house, it was unsettling not knowing where he was and he wasn't even 12 weeks old yet. I had to return to work when he was 6 weeks old.

I racked my brain trying to figure out how I could stay home with my son and enjoy him,
and enjoy being a mother instead of spending the majority of my day working for someone who didn't care about me. I figured out that the only way we could do this was if I watched other children in my home while I got to enjoy being a mother and not miss any milestones. So I started watching a little guy that was three weeks older than J myster. These two now have regular play-dates with each other. I watched Big J until his little sisters were born and his mom was able to stay home with them more. When J was a little over a year old I started watching a little girl too to help with this income. These three were best buds and I really did enjoy watching them. Then little Miss CB went to another place shortly after she turned two, but we were able to see CB for a little while for play dates at the park and I hope to do it again soon. I think its important that little ones make and keep friends.

My Second Blessing
To replace the income for loosing Big J, I put another ad out in the paper and shortly after the new year in 2011, I started watching C. C started becoming a little complicated. I got pregnant in March and watching C started getting difficult. C was a big baby and lifting him was starting to get difficult when he was rapidly becoming the same size as my two year old in weight. I also found that with all day morning sickness I just didn't have the stamina to keep up with the demands of this little guy and my son who seemed to have cabin fever from being couped up inside 5 days a week. He was acting out and I was pukey and exhausted for 23 weeks. C's mom could tell the days were daunting for me and soon C was moved to another home day care situation in just enough time for me to start having some complications. I had to be put on terbutaline for a little bit of pre-term labor. While I wasn't on bed rest, no doubt I would have been if I continued watching C. So thankfully due to having a ton of money in Savings from back when my husband got his pention from being let go from his last job, we knew we would be ok at least until after the baby was born.

Now after a year of being employed as an IT service guy at the only hospital in our town, my husband quickly moved up to a management roll. The only problem, he was doing this job, and being promised this promotion, but it went overlooked for 2 years. Finally Finally he now is getting paid for the work that he does. This is a huge relief for us! My husband has worked so hard to get this far and its so nice to finally see that he is being appreciated for all his knowledge and hard work. With his promotion, which is basically a 39% income increase, I no longer have to watch other children, I can stay home with my little guys and be a mother and not worry about who is taking care of them. This weekend I would have been working on a parent/caregiver contract and putting an ad on Craigslist, and I am so thankful for the blessings that God has given us and that I don't have to do that anymore. Its not that I didn't enjoy being a caregiver to the little ones I was watching, but its also nice to just give my attention to MY children. J Myster has had to share me with someone else since he was just 3 months old and yes he now has to share me with his little brother, but I have the ability now to take him out places. I can take him to open gym, to the library, to the park, to the Aquaplex thru-out the week and he doesn't have to be cooped up in the house all the time. I can do things with the boys now! We can afford it!

I can now replace the socks that I've been wearing the last six months that have holes warn all the way thru the heals without feeling guilty. I might just be able to buy myself a pair of jeans here real soon and not feel guilty that I spent 25 bucks on myself! It will be nice not having to worry about money. Does this extra income mean that we will now be frivolous with our money? No way! Will I still clip coupons and shop for the best deals, you bet ya. But it may actually mean we can buy a house this summer when our lease is up. We shall see what God has in store for us.

My Beautiful Family!
This mother is very grateful! I know there are many many moms out there who would give anything to stay home with their children, so I don't write this to rub it in, I just write this as its a changing point in our lives and I want to thank God for what he has given us and its definitely a blog worthy event in our lives. I will be forever grateful for my husband, my children and this life He has given me and thank Him for every breath I am able to take and every smile I get to see from my kids and husband.
Heather


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